Struggles Are REAL!

I hate planes.

It's not that I hate the flying part, or that I'm scared of being high above the ground. I actually rather enjoy that part.

Originally published at Keturah's Korner

But I hate all the security, and how rude everyone can be. And one time in particular I had a bad experience because they didn't like my skirt or my ID.

Of course this wasn't exactly the worst thing in the world. Many people have had many much more terrible experiences, to the point that they were truly violated or their lives in danger.

And one person made sure to tell me this when I told them why I didn't like flying.

Ouch.

That's all I can think when someone says your fears or struggles are unbiased because of others' real struggles.

You scrunch up and feel guilty. It's like someone is saying, “You don't know what real pain and fear is, because you have been too sheltered. You don't even know how to truly love God, because you have never really been tested.”

Or maybe they outright say this.

You're like, “So all this stuff going on in my mind has been dramatized? I don't actually have struggles?”

In that case you can be like, “Well, let's just smile then. And enjoy life.”

Just kidding...

And if that were the extent of your trial it may be easy. But normally it's not.

I was talking to a friend recently who is going through a very hard time, emotionally and with close people in her life. Sometimes I get so riled up for her (and others) when I think great people are so blindly “persecuting” someone as dear as her with their words and actions. And it's as if they are blind.. yet think their eyes are wide open!

“I know the feeling,” I told her. “ 'God why me? Why now? Why can I not have just this one thing?' His tests are pretty hard sometimes. Too hard, to bear, it feels. We are told we have it easy compared to others. But do we? Or is this just man's way of saying 'I don't care about you.'?

“ 'What you are going through is just a lie from the devil.' We are told. But is it? Sure God heals, but one of the realities of sin is that life is horrible. Even great men in the Bible screamed and yelled at God, questioning the pain in their lives.

“Rough times exist.

“No matter the level humans set trials at, our trials, our emotional stress, our struggles, all we go through is the same. It's all hardest for each individual.

“It's wrong for people to say, 'Look how good you have it compared to so and so.' You know what? That's all compared to human standards! People don't need a, 'You're okay, just look at Africa.' They need a hug, some comfort, a few words of encouragement.”

“If any thing is a lie from the devil, it's the belief that what we go through doesn't matter.”

It's all great and good to think nothing but certain catastrophes matter and are worthy of depression, but the words, “Get over yourself. Remember the kids in Africa – the ones that are dying because of lack of clothes and food. You have it good. No one in America truly suffers.” are not a way to comfort someone.

Neither is the statement, “What you're going through is a lie from the devil.”

What does that accomplish? Nothing but unnecessary guilt on the victims part. And pent up emotions and trials that they don't know what to do with since they obliviously shouldn't have them.

My above first example wasn't very good But I think you got the point. Hopefully. Haha.

We all go through things – and sometimes those things aren't as big and ugly in appearance as starving children in Africa.

But to our minds, to the reality we know, they FEEL just as big and ugly.

To us they ARE JUST AS BAD AS STARVING TO DEATH.

Because this is the very REAL and UGLY struggle God has placed into our lives and minds.

And because of that, we need to remember one thing: Don't tear other people down farther by telling them what they go through is unreal.

Comfort them. Encourage them. Help them get over what they are going through with love, understanding, and when and if the times calls for, gentle admonition towards something better and more fulfilling.

Critical words don't kill fear and heal hurt. Love and kindness do.

Remember, fellow believers. We aren't called to bring ones trials down to exalt our own or others. We are called to love each and everyone. Not everyone is capable of handling the same pain. But we can still love them. Nor are we to judge trials by man's standard.

Sure, starvation seems horrid. It is horrible. But so are all the other things we are burdened with. Each are equally important to the person going through it.

One of the realities of this sin-filled life is there will be many people going through hard times, and you will be faced with the choice: Tear them down or love them?

So, be a friend to people. Comfort and dry others' tears, don't cause them. Love people, don't look down at them. And instead of pushing them away, give them a big a hug or two.

Yea, Though I Walk Through Unending Prairies

Another mountain climbed. Another valley crossed. They turned over another cornerstone, opened a new page.

They have done much in life.

"God, why am I the only Christian that has made neither progress in my walk with you, and with the destiny of my life? Am I lukewarm? Neither hot nor cold?"

Before me. Behind me. It's the same. It stretches for miles and miles. I continue to move, but the scenery stays the same. An unending prairie - in front and behind.

Dull. Lifeless. Void of anything different.

Yet, I continue to go. My path is too easy to walk. Yet I find this in itself too hard.

Because when something is hard, when it has texture it is easier to keep going. It must also be easier to forget that they even have to walk, and in a way one could enjoy the hardships, because it adds color to life. Their mountains and valleys show progress.

All around me, my friends join me on my path for a short while, before heading back to their mountains.

I hear stories of reaching the peak of their mountain of joy. Yes, they have fallen into the valleys of sin, and had a hard time climbing some of those rocky terrains, but at least they could always see the distance they had put behind them.

The final peak may be far, but they can see themselves coming to it. Sometimes they don't even need to go any where, because of how sure they are of making it.

But me? Why do I even continue to walk? My path has had no turns, besides those of temptation. It had neither gone up or down. Always the same.

I can see not where I'm going, nor where I've come from.

And then I hear a voice. God. "It's not the path that matters, nor how many trials others seem to experience. Sometimes the easiest path can be the hardest And most worthy - because it is the one that takes more determination. You must constantly drive yourself forwards to a goal you can barely see. And despite the lack of progress you think you see, you continue going."

I smile.

So that is the secret.

It's about me keeping on. Continuing on the path God has given me, not jealous of others' trials and joys.

It's about me staying joyful despite that my path has appeared as a prairie wasteland instead of a magnificent mountain.

It's about me being joyful where God has placed me, and not trying to run off to join the others on their mountains. Not that those are evil.

But that is not where God has called me.

I laugh with inner joy.

The others' demeaning shouts - when they try to downplay my trials, I will not let it bother me.

For none of that matters.

All that matters is keeping on. Doing what God has for me. And not caring if my own personal desire for achievement is ever satisfied.

God's way is enough.

Hello, Reader. Do you ever feel this way... that life just seems to continue on without challenge or excitement? It's a dangerous place to be... for shortly after writing this post I was finally tossed into the mountains and I acquired that struggle I yearned to know. It was not at all glamorous, but painful. But still yet again I learned... I learned how to be satisfied no matter where I was walking in life.

Be careful what you wish for. And learn to love and smile wherever you are... that's the key to learning contentment :) 

This was originally posted on my blog, Keturah's Korner. 

What Would I Be Wearing?

So, sometimes I have really weird thoughts.

Just like my fashion tastes. I mean, who but me would wear this:

Yes. OK, a little weird, I'll admit. And, yes, I went out in public in this. But, hey, I loved it!

Anyways, to get on point.

As I was wearing this I started realizing each item had a huge story. Each story different, separated by time and place. Yet each of those together had brought me to where I was now, here. Another place, another time.

I wondered, "If I hadn't experienced what I had what would I be wearing today? Would my fashion style be crazier, or more sane?"

The hat is the oldest piece of this outfit. At least the oldest as to coming into my possession. When I was  seventeen-eighteen I knitted for a local yarn shop. I made a decent amount of money doing so, plus I was able to trade for quality yarn without spending my own cash. This hat is one of my favorite things I made myself from that time.

Back when the world saw me as a knitter. I brought my knitting everywhere with me. For every stitch counted. Every moment was money being earned or not.

The skirt came from my time as a Ruby Girl, the second time. Being a Ruby girl changed me in so many ways. Or did it develop me into more of me? I'm not sure. But it was one the hardest and best things I ever did. Some of my best (and worst) memories come from then.

One time while shopping with friends I found the material for this skirt at Walmart and loved it! It was on sale for a super good price. The skirt cost me $1 to make ;)

The shirt was a hand-me-down from a neighbor we met when I first moved to Montana with my family. Back then I was obsessed with embroidery, and knitting, a little. I would take my embroidered tea towels to every boutique-type business or gas station to see if they wanted to buy my work.

The lady who gave me this shirt was one of the first people I asked to buy my embroidery. I now see a lot of her, and have received a good deal of clothing from  her.

The boots came from a family we met at a church we've been regularly attending now for about three years. We almost didn't go to that church... my family has been the type to believe independent of man, straight from scripture not the pulpit. Yet we all needed fellowship. And so we went. It's been a great growing experience, even though we still believe to study from Bible over man first.


And so, my crazy outfit really has a lot to say. And I realize this is true of all my clothes. They all tell a story of my life in Missouri, Montana, Tennessee, Kentucky, and Texas. Some of the stories are complicated. Some of them determined where I am today. Some of them are merely reminders of memories I'd rather not dwell on... yet how can you throw away a skirt simply because of where you got it from, or who it reminds you of?

I keep the clothes as long as I need them. The memories will come or go anyways. And they will continue to blossom as I live life and experience new things.

Yet, sometimes I wonder, as I did while wearing that above outfit, "What sort of person would I be like, what I would be wearing, if I had done that differently?"

It's an interesting question.

And a reminder that what I wear is influenced by who I am.

What memories do you associate with what you are wearing today? Do you ever wonder what you might be wearing if you had walked a different path than you walk now?

Am I Safe in My Sin?

Originally posted on my blog

"Once saved, always saved." 

 What a controversial statement. One that contains so much meaning - and causes so much arguing. 

 It mostly is based from the following passage, Romans 8:31-39 "What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things? Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God's elect? It is God that justifieth. Who is he that condemneth? It is Christ that died, yea rather, that is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter. Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Is this passage saying that we can not SIN against God? 

Is it saying that no matter what we do we shall go to heaven? 

Does it say God will forgive any evil we do with out repentance?

  Some believe so...but I think it more says that God always loves us and won't change His mind about us. 

 He loved us before we loved Him. 

How could He ever stop loving us if He loved us so much while we were still sinners?

 He loved us so much that He died for us in the the hope that we might love Him back.

 It says that evil things done to us aren't signs of His lack of love. No one else can change His mind towards us. It says all this. 

 But never does it say that "God loves us so much that even while we SIN we have our names written in God's book." 

 No one else can make God stop loving us, but is it possible for us to stop loving God? I believe the answer is "Yes." 

 And for those that don't love God anymore? God will still love them - but the God of love is still a God of justice and those that WON'T BE with Him must go where He has said those that don't love Him go. 

 Hebrews 10:26-31 NIV "For if we sin wilfully after that we have received the knowledge of the truth, there remaineth no more sacrifice for sins, but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God. Anyone who rejected the law of Moses died without mercy on the testimony of two or three witnesses. How much more severely do you think someone deserves to be punished who has trampled the Son of God underfoot, who has treated as an unholy thing the blood of the covenant that sanctified them, and who has insulted the Spirit of grace? For we know him who said, “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” and again, “The Lord will judge his people.” It is a dreadful thing to fall into the hands of the living God." 

 Yes, God loves us. And He proves His love to us in actions. And if we truly love Him back we will prove our love  in actions - doing that which doesn't hurt Him or go against him. 

 Imagine two best friends. 

 Basil and Joey are best friends. 

They do everything together. But Joey is changing. 

He no longer treats Basil with respect. He talks bad about Basil. Lies, steals from him. Basil soon discovers that Joey is no longer a true friend. 

He believes that they once were - but now? People tell him to just get on with life. Forgive Joey and be friends, but how can he when Joey is constantly using and abusing him? 

What would you do? 

What should God do? 

 What happens when we turn against God? Disrespect Him? Misplace our love and devotion? His righteous judgment is released upon us. 

 What happens when we confess yet do not prove our words with actions?  

Romans 1:18-23 NIV "For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who hold the truth in unrighteousness; Because that which may be known of God is manifest in them; for God hath shewed it unto them. For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse: Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened. Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools, and changed the glory of the incorruptible God into an image made like to corruptible man, and to birds, and four-footed beasts, and creeping things." 

 And on a side-note - yes we all sin (Romans 3:23). 

But never should we use accidents or mistakes as an excuse to continue hurting others and God. Even in friendships, one or the other will make mistakes at times. 

But do we continue to hurt the other? 

Or do we apologize and start afresh careful to be the best friend ever? 

 I believe it is very important to realize that sinning is not good nor acceptable. Repentance exists for a reason, yes, but never should we make up reasons to repent. 

 For we all should run from all appearance of evil, avoid sinning, strive to love God above all (2 Timothy 2:22). 

  1 John 1:9 "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

Flowing On The Go

"What should I do? What am I SUPPOSE to do?"

Originally posted here

"Just go with the flow." 

"Trust God. Just see what happens." 

"No need to worry about it. Everything WILL work out."

Now this is all good advice. But it's all missing something. It's lacking the solution to the real question. 

  ACTION 

 There's no action in any of those answers. 

 "It'll happen." 

 How? 

 Yes, it's good to just wait and have patience.

 Worry never helps. 

Trust is very good. 

And it is very, very good to rely on God. 

 But after that? 

 We have to move. 

Take action. 

 Along with doing that we have to still have patience and trust God. 

We still need to go with the flow... but we need to make sure we are on the go. 

 We should be passively active. 

 So, keep moving towards more than inactivity.

Let's flow towards purposeful outcomes. Never go with the flow - but let's be flowing on the go!!

The Testimony of A Liar

This is not my testimony... but one I made up ;) the sole purpose of this is to show two things:

1. Testimonies aren't always true nor worthy of sympathy -  the sort of sympathy that makes you consider changing your views.

2. You have to be very careful when people use verses to back up their claims. Because more likely than not, they may be using this verse to fit their testimony instead of molding their life to fit God's word.

Also, I hope you may find many opportunities to laugh in this. :D After reading the article check out the following verses: Proverbs 12:22, John 8:44, Exodus 23:1, and Colossians 3:9.

Originally posted here. 

Growing up was very hard for me, because I was living a lie - not who I was at heart, a liar. 

 I had a decent family, yes. I even grew up in a great church family, and was saved at an early age. If it wasn't for my faith in God I don't know how I could have lived through my childhood. Because even though my family and church was great they were more of legalistic judgers rather than lovers.

 Lying is just who I am...even back when I was a small child. 

I crave and need the attention I receive from my lies. 

But people, mostly adults including my parents, would not accept this from me. They said I was being naughty. Childish. 

 They said it wasn't right. That God forbade lying.

 I was devastated that I could be so evil. I tried so hard to stop lying - but it was a part of my nature - 

I was born to lie. 

 I felt so terrible during the last few years of my childhood, and even during my teens. I tried hard to conform to what my family and peers wanted. But sometimes my true self would slip out. I would question my place in life. 

Why did God create such a person as I? Why would he put a nature in me that was one He hated? On top of doubting my own worth I began to even doubt God's existence and love. 

 It was after I had left home. Living on my own hasn't changed anything. Others still judged me.  I always felt so broken and alone. 

Belittled and abandoned. People would spread falsehoods about my lying. 

 One day I could take it no more. I closed my door to the world, sat myself down and took only my Bible. "Father," I cried. "I am tired of living this life you have forced upon me. Why should I be this way if it's wrong? Show me what to do - or end my life." 

 Immediately I opened my bible to the ten commandments. It was because of these commandments, people told me, my life was condemned. 

 My eyes at once saw Exodus 20:16. "Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor." But I did not feel ugly. I never felt ugly when reading scripture, because God does not use it to judge us, but guide us. On top of that, for the first time I read this verse with sincerity. 

Wow. I had never before seen this. It does not say "Thou shalt not lie"....but that "Thou shalt not TELL LIES ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS TO HARM THEM." 

 And even though my nature is a lying nature I have never said something untrue to hurt someone. Never. You have no idea how fulfilled this verse made me feel. 

I started looking up other verses, and all seemed to be calling out to me to embrace the person God had created me to be - a Liar. 

 It was hard at first to show others who God wanted me to be, and even though God is with me, certain individuals still aren't. But this being hard has proved to me even more that lying is right for me - for nothing easy can be right or satisfying. 

 Almost as much as I love living out who I am I love sharing my testimony. The only thing that saddens me is when people don't believe it. But what encourages me more then that is God knows that it is true. 

 And so I live happy and free! 

  ~ The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. Proverbs 16:9

Objectifying Guys

Originally posted here

Most girls hate men that objectify them - the type of guys that think of girls as nothing more than a thing to use as they please, someone to control, etc.

But amidst all their complaining of how guys are evil, selfish beings with no good guys left, most girls are doing the same thing they hate those guys for- making unrealistic images out of men for their own selves.

 Fantasies based on nothing more than selfish dreams.

Here are three ways I feel we, as girls, objectify men. Remember, these are just my personal convictions and things I've noticed in other girls (and myself) and the subsequent consequences of what they did/ did not do. :)

1. Flirting (for no purpose, save the thrill of flirting) - Selfish Means of Drawing Attention

 When a girl does this she is not thinking of the guy in a very nice way. He's become an object in her mind, one she is trying to conquer for her own personal and emotional reasons. She is not thinking of him as a friend. She is not considering ways that she can help him... but of ways that he can please her. Be something to her. 

  One who plays with a guy's emotions through means of flirting does so to satisfy her own wants. 

  2. Dramatizing About Guys Through Discussions or Media

 I've seen this done in several ways: blogging, social media, literature, and friends. In every situation girls will talk about real and fictional guys with unrealistic ideals about them. I will use 16 year old fictional characters Jana and her friend Carol to explain what I mean of how girls do this with boys.

example 1:

Jana, has several "guy friends". 

Not that this is bad. 

She texts them all regularly. 

This is not necessarily bad either. 

 But her whole life is wrapped around these guys. One evening after a terribly long, stressful day Jana gets on facebook. Her friend, Chad is on, so she sends him a message. He doesn't reply as soon as she'd like. She sends out quick messages to her three other friends, Bryon, Luke and Tim who are also on facebook. 

Soon after one of them replies. She gives a quick squeal of delight and texts back. Not long after this most of her guy friends are texting Jana. Her fingers are typing rapidly as she talks to each of them. 

One of her girl-friends, Carol, sends a message to Jana. 

Jana replies... only after having replied to each of the other guys multiple times each. They chat a bit, but Jana is disinterested with her best friend right now and doesn't keep her part of the conversation up. Soon she's just facebook messaging her guy friends. Jana feels like her day has been pretty good after all as she finally goes to bed late that night, all her stress gone. 

Now what was wrong with this? It isn't that what she was doing was necessarily bad... except she was making false images out of all these young men.

Already her happiness was wrapped around how they treated her - her happiness was purely based on a selfish level.

It had nothing to do with how her friendship was with Carol, what she did with others, or even her relationship with God. It was purely based on the vibes she got from her guy-friends. 

example 2: 

"Have you started Mockingbird yet?" Carol runs up to Jana the next day. 

 "A little. Isn't Peeta so great in this one?" 

 "Yaaass!!!" 

 Jana smiles and pulls the book from her bag, "Just listen to this!" She reads a part from the book depicting their favorite character doing a particularly unique thing. "I can't wait for the last movie to be released!" Carol sighs as Jana finishes reading. 

 "Which reminds me," Jana squeals in agreement, adding "There's a new movie coming out next month and you won't believe who acts in it?" 

 "Who!?" Carol asks, eyes big. 

As Jana tells her, Carol returns, "Not him! Oh, I'm just dying to see that!" 

Again, fiction fan talk can be fun... and not bad. But why do so many girls focus only on the guys in fiction? the plots (unless it's that romantic twist) don't matter. The other characters are okay... but those fake guys - "If only there were a real man like - I'd marry him today!"

The sad thing is most of these girls are serious. And even sadder... few of them can understand that men and fictional characters are two different things... you can't base real life dreams off of a made-up idea.

example 3:

Later that night Carol is excited because a certain guy messaged her - first! She quickly calls Jana to let her know of the "good news". 

 "No way!" Jana giggles. "What did he say? Really!?" 

 Carol must have asked Jana how her guy-life was doing, because Jana next says, "Really good. Chad messages me a lot still. But guess who has started talking to me more!? Jordyn!!! I know! I still don't know which I like best. He has just like the greatest hair ever, but Jordyn is just so sweet!" 

 I think it's pretty obvious that these girls are boy crazy :/ And I may have exaggerated a little (not much, you can be sure). 

The way girls and women do this online and in real life, about unreal guys is just as sickening.

 Whether talking about all the awesome guys in Twilight, Hunger Games or Lord of The Rings. Or comparing and dreaming about boy-celebrities in music and tv ( I don't need to give examples, I'm afraid because there are soooo many ). Or swooning over the terribly chivalrous men of the Jane Austin era literature, girls are comparing each guy to how their future husband will someday be by making "objects" and idols out of them. 

 Girls, what we are doing is "drooling" ( figuratively ) over men in an unladylike way. As if guys were made just to please us... 

  3. "I just can't talk to guys." - Through shyness

"Wait....how's that objectifying boys????" 

This is the most common and subtle way girls dehumanize men. A lot of my readers might not relate to my first two points... but many of you may be in this third category. 

 A while back I read a book by Elizabeth and Anna Sofia Botkin. I disagreed with most of their book and thought it too extreme, but they made one very crucial point. 

 "Boys are people, too." 

 When you say you can't talk to guys in a specific age group you are automatically saying that you do not see these certain men as people but as objects. Instead of reacting with firtation, you ignore them totally (as if that is better). 

 You are forgetting that they are people. Just think about it. I know guys that act so shy and won't hardly speak a word to girls. This irritates me to death. When someone is so shy that they can't talk to you because of your gender or age... that's just horrible.

People tend to classify me more in the first category as I can be "too" friendly so I take it as rude when people (guys) won't talk to me. I'm like, "Come on, dude! This is just a conversation not a marriage proposition." Lol. If a guy can't talk to me he's got problems. What do most guys think when we won't talk to them? 

Not that it isn't a struggle. We have so many people telling us girls how to act, talk, and dress around guys. There's so much peer pressure about either catching a good guy or acting appropriate.

I'm not saying it's not hard.

But we still need to think about how our words and action will make those guys feel. 

It can actually be worse to not talk to a guy than to flirt with him. By not talking you show that you are so interested in him as a guy that you can't talk to him, yet aren't interested enough to find out more about him as a person. You don't care about him as a human being, is what is being unintentionally said. 

 But how should we treat guys? 

 We should treat guys our age just like anybody else. 

If the occasion calls for it, say "hi!".  Ask how they are doing. Start conversation, or observe. If they are disinterested, don't force them to keep talking, or if they walk away, let them, just like you would any other person. Treat a guy just as you would a person. Be you.

If the guy still walks away after you have been nice - that's their problem. All you can do is be sociable. If they move on, do the same yourself. Talk to the next person - guy or girl. If you know someone, don't ignore them - even if they are a guy. 

 It's not wrong to initiate or have conversations with guys, even multiple guys. What's wrong is thinking of guys in an unrealistic way and how you react to those thoughts. 

 And for the benefit of my many girl friends who label themselves boy-crazy - I'm not saying it's wrong to like guys or even want to get married. I'm saying treat guys like people. 

Don't idolize them. 

Don't hurt them by flirting with them. 

Think of them, not yourself, more often. And also, make sure to keep the multiple girls in your life, too. Don't just have friends that are guys. That's just weird, and choosing your friends a little too closely. ;) 

 Don't objectify specific people or ideas about people, but be a friend to all people. Of course even when being friends with guys, there's a balance. It's extremely hard when trying not to flirt to accidentally fall into category 3, or when trying to not be rude to become too flirty. 

And people will often falsely accuse you as you try to find this balance.

But that's okay... just keep being nice.

 And you can't quite treat guys as you would your close girl friends, but you can treat them as friends, as people deserving respect and friendship, with out being awkward or rude or flirty. :D 

  What do you think of my thoughts on this? As a girl, do you get classified as a certain type when around guys? What are some things you think you can do to be a better friend to EVERYONE? I'd love to hear your thoughts on this!