Accepting Unjust Criticism with Grace

Originally posted at Keturah's Korner 

How can one use criticism to grow instead of break down and feel condemned? How can you master pride yet keep your self-worth, even if you are right?

Impossible it seems.

It's a very hard thing… It's easier if you are actually wrong – or at least the answer is easier to give. Haha.

Just get over yourself. Accept the correction. Just change.

But when you aren't wrong?

(And when you are truly not in denial)

I think most of us will find ourselves facing this one time or another. But not often – because normally, let's face it. We are wrong. We deserve the criticism. And even if there is wrong on the other side, there is usually just as much fault if not more on our side.

But there will be those few times when this is not the case. And this can be very hurtful, and even discouraging if the people accusing are very close, yet not open to what's true.

Still we need to remember a few things, so we don't join the wrong side. Because it's very easy to start out innocent and become truly guilty.

Here are my tips for keeping from drowning in a place where condemning words seem to be crashing all around you, pulling you in, so that all you want to do is scream out in frustration and beat some sense into EVERYONE.

1. No matter what, do not allow what has happened affect you or your beliefs. Individuals do not define God, but most are imperfect broken shards of His reflection trying to glue themselves back together to be more like Yeshua (Jesus), but failing miserably. Including you.


2. Remember that you AREN'T perfect. Try and see what you may have done wrong. Admit that, and work on fixing THAT and CHANGING.

But he gives more grace. Therefore he says, God resists the proud, but gives grace unto the humble. ~ James 4:6

3. Apologize – even if you don't need to.
I'm not saying lie. I'm saying being a peace-maker.

Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord ~ Hebrews 12:14. See also Romans 12:18.

Don't add to the tension by holding on to pride. Just be sorry. “I'm sorry that I (-). I didn't mean to do that to you.”
Don't be haughty when apologizing. Be sincere.


4. It's OK to be right.
Many will respect you for being humble – most know how hard it is ;b. And even if they know that you think you were still in the right, if they see that you are sorry for offending them most will not be so upset.
Or maybe even feel a little convicted. Though don't count on that too much. LOL.
So, don't try to make peace by giving in and admitting something that isn't true.

It might not always work. What then?

Don't become bitter. Don't hate. And don't return the evil by harshly criticizing the person in return.

Yes, you may be right, the other wrong. But sometimes some things just won't and can't ever be proved in this world.

But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect. ~ Matthew 5:48

But you don't have to become ugly with hate or bitterness. You don't have to allow anything to change you or your beliefs in God. And you don't have to join the hypocrisy by allowing what they said to be just like them – closed to the truth of God's love, truth, and righteousness.

Remember that, and even when people tear you down, you can still be whole and full.

O give thanks unto the LORD; for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever. ~ Psalm 136:1

Inspirational Fashion

Not really a fashion post - yet, here are some great quotes that might still inspire your dressing style :)

Totally! :)

My closet ;D

I really like this one :)

Wow...this is so true...how much do you say with the way you dress?

What are you WANTING to tell the world?

I hope you are all having a wonderful weekend!!! What was the best thing that happened last week to you?

And It Came to Pass...

 Hello everyone! I'm so sorry about my absence. Life has been crazy for this high school senior. I hope that all of you have been well! To kick off my first post in a long time, I've decided to do another Scripture Encouragement Monday!

 With the day most Christians celebrate the birth of Christ quickly approaching, I think it would be nice to reflect on a verse or more talking about this momentous occasion.

 And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be taxed.
 (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)
 And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.
  And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of        David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)
 To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.
 And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.
 And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn. ~ Luke 2:1-7

  In these verses we learn about Jesus' earthly parents, Joseph and Mary. We see pretty quickly that Mary is heavy with child, but still they have to travel to Joseph's hometown, which is a pretty long journey for someone who is about to give birth, to pay taxes. They make it to the town, but soon after Mary goes into labor. The Inn keeper has no room for them, so they find themselves in a stable, where Mary gives birth, her baby's cradle turning out to be a manger. 

 What a thought! Jesus all through His ministry on earth showed great humbleness, and it was shown from the beginning when he was born in a humble stable, surrounded by animals. Jesus was the meekest man ever while he was on earth, and we should follow His example!

 This is pretty short, but I hope it gives you a bit to think about. Next week, we'll continue further. Also, is there any sort of topic you would like to see discussed on APOC? Post it below, and we'll do what we can to cover it!!! :) 

 

The Calling

 Hello. Would you like to go on an adventure of great exploits, and exciting experiences? Would you like your words to hold great meaning, and your life to show great things? Well, I have something very special for you. It is The Calling.

 ^ Sorry for the bad sales pitch. But... you ask... what is The Calling?

 God has a special purpose for everyone. One person might be called to preach, another to teach, or maybe even sing. This calling in whatever form is so important. Your calling will involve great exploits, and exciting experiences when God is directing your paths, whether these exploits include trekking through Africa, or merely singing a special at your local church. Your words will hold great meaning, and your life will show great things when God is your pilot.

 Finding the true direction God wants you to go- your true calling- can be hard. You pray for the Lord to show you His purpose, you tell Him you'll do whatever He desires, and still you're pulling up a blank. You might think you have an idea of what The Calling might be... for example, I have a special place on my heart for children, so I think The Calling might have something to do with that. God has also placed within me a gift and desire for singing, writing, and acting. I don't know what His plans could be involving these things, but I know that when He asks me to use them, I must.

 But still... You may have an idea, but you aren't sure. What if you think you're calling is to preach, but you try and embarrass yourself? What if you think your calling is to sing, but you sound like you have a frog in your throat?

Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might; for there is no work, nor device, nor knowledge, nor wisdom, in the grave, whither thou goest. ~ Ecclesiastes 9:10

 I suggest praying. Even if you've prayed a million times, pray for peace about whatever you need to do, and pray that God's will be done.  

I can be a hard to thing to give in, and let God's will happen, but this is an incremental part to answering The Calling. 

 I still don't know entirely what The Calling is for me. I pray, and may feel certain about some areas, but still confused about others. But I want to tell you something. 

 You are called. Yes, you! There is a Calling that you don't have to wait to receive. There is a Calling every child of God has as part of their responsibility. The Calling is the most important part of being a Christian. The Calling defines us. 

  Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen. ~ Matt. 28:19

 This Calling is not given to a specific person. This command was given to all who were present at the ascension of Christ, and carries over to every Child of the King. So when you feel discouraged, still praying for The Calling, remember that you are called for something great. You are called to be ambassadors of Christ, bringing the good news of Jesus to all in the world. There is your adventure and great exploits. There is the meaning and weight of words. The Calling is so important for the souls of all. 

 Will you accept The Call?