Sunday, September 7, 2014

Being Single in A Not So Single Time {guest post}

Today, it seems like everyone has a boyfriend. (Or girlfriend if you are a guy) so you can imagine some of the strange, and sometimes funny, thing people say when you tell them you are single. Okay, well usually that’s not what get’s priceless reactions from people its usually what I say afterwards. I simply will tell people (if the topic comes up about dating or boyfriends as such) that I have chosen not to date. Usually that always leads to the question of ‘Why?’ and usually when I politely answer everyone seems to start a debate even though that was never my intention or people jump in to defend themselves. ( I am not saying dating is a bad thing it’s just a decision I have made)

I have chosen not to date at all. One day when the time comes and ‘Mister Right’ comes my way then yes, maybe I will start dating but at the moment I really don’t know where this path will lead since it is all new to me.

I will admit that being single, in a not so single time, is really, really hard and sometimes even confusing or frustrating. Especially when you are an older teen who is on the verge of adulthood. For me, most of the time I see my friends going into relationships with people or dating/courting someone and sometimes I kind of wish that maybe I did date or I just wish that ‘Mr. Right’ would hurry up and get here. (That might sound funny how I worded it but it’s true.)

In this day and age almost anyone you meet (Well teenagers or young adults anyways) is either in a dating relationship or has been at some point in their life. So, you can imagine how hard and sometimes stressful it can be to go through life being single and sometimes just feeling alone.  I’m sure some of you can relate or have felt this at some point.

A couple friends and I always joke around too on how much we despise ‘Valentine’s Day’ (We don’t actually) and how we want to make a special annual event for singles but even though we joke around about these things and being single sometimes my friends and I (and I’m sure some of you as well) really do feel alone simply because most people around you have been in or are in a relationship.

Now, I’m really hoping this isn’t coming across as complaining. (Because that is not what I am trying to do at all.) Sometimes all it takes is just a simple reminder as to why you made the decision not to date and just talking to God. Tell him your struggles or worries because he always listens.

This summer was especially hard for me and I was worrying about what would happen and when I would meet 'Mr. Right'. I know it sounds silly, but really, I was. I was also a little bummed and started asking myself why I couldn't date someone and all these questions that made me kind of want to change my mind about dating. It was during my camping trip with my uncle and aunty this summer that I was reminded of a book I packed to read during the summer. (I brought about 20 books) I hurried into the trailer and dug through my box of books and pulled out 'I Kissed Dating Goodbye' by Joshua Harris. When I packed my books I didn't really know why I was bringing it but it seemed to serve its purpose. :)
For the next couple days I carried around that book wherever I went and sat on the beach for hours on end while I read.

The author went through every topic in the dating world and spoke honestly about it.
Most importantly her turned to the bible, giving examples of what God says in the bible for each chapter topic. I cannot think of one chapter in the book where the author didn’t use a verse from the bible. Everything he said was backed up with a bible verse.

One thing that jumped out at me in the book was where the author spoke of singleness and the reason behind it (according to the Bible).
This was a great thing for me because, like I said before, its hard sometimes.

Sometimes I wish I had a boyfriend like everyone else or that a boy would tell me he liked me! Today it is especially hard because so many people are in relationships. (Especially a lot of my friends)

The author of the book mentioned how our years being single (As in being a young adult or teenager) are short and should be spent growing closer to God and digging deeper into his word.
I now realize how important this stage of my life is!
I’m now seeing the importance of being single now. Sometimes it just takes something like this to open your eyes.

I want to leave you today, with this.

You need to focus on God. That’s what's important…and then, when God knows you are ready 'Mr. Right' will come along. Just trust God and his timing and spend your time of singleness wisely growing closer to God. God knows what he is doing. He is writing your love story and it will be beautiful.
God bless,
(Visit Adriana at her blog Adriana Gabrielle Writes)


  1. I love that book! And its why I don't believe in dating.

  2. That book was a great encouragement for me and a great reminder as to why I don't date :). I plan to read his book on courtship next.

    1. Is that boy meets girl? I just got that book and plan too read it soon.

    2. Yeah it is :) I can't wait to read it. Just need to find the time xD

  3. Yes,sometimes it can be hard to wait for Mr. Right to come along...and when the time comes, I plan on courting.

    1. Yes, it is. And that is my plan as well :)