But truly this perspective began with one completely different than the one I now hold.
Yes, I'm ashamed to say that once, my view of women was so tarnished by mass media and the incredible ease of access to sexually explicit content our modern world now provides, that by age 11, I probably thought of girls more as sex objects than human beings.
I took (and still do take) responsibility for my thoughts and actions, laying them at the foot of the cross when I was 13 and turning away from who I was. As a new Christian trying to obey what Jesus said in Matthew 5:28 about not looking at women with lust while fighting the influx of testosterone slowly making me a man, I often felt disgruntled by how most women (both Christian and non-Christian alike unfortunately) seemed not to care or even notice how they dressed and what it might be doing to the males around them.
Now let me make this point clear: I do believe it is a guy’s responsibility to guard his eyes, heart, and mind, if he sins by looking lustfully at a girl (no matter how skimpily clad) it’s his problem and he needs to repent and ask forgiveness for himself.
Being that I did believe this, I had to learn to bounce my eyes away every low-cut shirt, every high cut skirt, and every girl that seemed to say with her clothing “Look at me! I’m developing physically!”
Safe to say my eyes often feel like pinballs.
The funny thing was that as I was learning to discipline myself when it came to girl’s clothes, I started to notice that the girls I hung out with could be affected very similarly by what boys were wearing.
This was a wake up call.
Suddenly, I started noticing how frequently we men expose our bodies. Whether it’s a 20 foot sign of a shirtless model sporting a six-pack in the mall or guys posting selfies of their bodies on Facebook with the caption “Just back from the gym”, it's like an epidemic. At least with girls, older women and men as well as many Christian leaders made mention of modesty, yet for guys the idea of being modest seems laughable.
I don’t believe this should be. I think modesty can and should apply to all. I know the feeling of relief and gratitude I experience when a girl at church comes in dressed beautifully yet modestly.
You can only imagine my joy at learning there are entire blogs like APOC teaching and exhorting girls to modesty.
In response to the conviction of the Holy Spirit and love for God and my sisters in Christ, I have decided to start dressing more modestly myself.
To all the girls out there wondering if you won’t look pretty to that special guy wearing a floor length skirt instead of jeans that look like you just painted over your skin, let me assure you, if he’s quality, he will notice you.
Chard Phebe is a nearly eighteen year old author, writer, photographer, and Bible student, as well as the second oldest of six children. He goes by his pen-name C.H. Phebe often online. Starting fall 2013 he will be studying at the University of Central Florida in Orlando, Florida as a Business Management major. In Chard's free time he likes to read, write, blog, and attend home groups/serve in his church. He prays that his writings bless the hearts, minds, and souls of every reader and that each may be an act of worship to our Lord, Savior, Creator, and First Love, Jesus Christ. You can read his personal blog at www.theovp.blogspot.com